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Flour Sack Towels
Flour Sack Towels
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Every woman has a bit of Marilyn inside her. You just have to figure out if it’s Monroe or Manson.
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Everyday I understand the phrase,’I’m getting too old for this sh*t’ on an even deeper level.
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Everyone needs a friend that calls them out of the blue and says: “Get dressed, bitch. Were going on an adventure.
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Everyone needs a hobby. Mine is cocktails.
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Everyone should have a sister like you. Why should I be the only one to suffer?
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Everyone was thinking it, I just said it.
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Everything in my neighborhood is closing so I’m about to open up a strip club/breakfast diner/daycare center. I’m calling it TITS, GRITS and WE BABYSITS.
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Everything is figureoutable.
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Everything will be fine in the end. If its not, its not the end.
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Everytime I say ‘no’ my kid hears ‘ask again. She didn’t understand the question.’
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Everytime I see a mattress on top of a car I think the prostitues are doing Door Dash now.
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Exercise gives you energy, but you need energy to exercise. Sounds like a pyramid scheme to me.
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Exercise. . . I thought you said Accessorize!
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Exercising would be so much more rewarding if calories screamed while you burned them.
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Exhaustipated: (Adjective) Too tired to give a shit.
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F
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