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Showing 481–496 of 1179 results

I wish I was the person I thought I was when I bought all this produce.

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I wish people wou;d pay me for sitting on the couch and looking pretty.

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I won’t take a bullet for anyone because if I have time to jump in front of it, you have time to move.

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I wonder how many miles I have scrolled with my thumb.

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I wonder how people would react if I walked into SEA WORLD with a fishing pole.

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I work well with others when they leave me alone.

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I would call my fashion style “clothes that still fit.

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I would have never believed that a few weeks of uncut hair would weigh 20 pounds but that’s what the scale says.

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I would jump up and down for Joy but my boobs are just way too big for that nonsense.

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I would share pictures of my boobs, but the bathroom mirror does not go down low enough to get the shot.

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I,ve been hiding from exercise. I’m in the Fitness Protection Plan.

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I’m a slut for tacos. A tac-ho if you will.

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I’m beginning to thinkthat for some of you, the wheels on your bus do not go round and round.

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I’m fixin’ to get into trouble. You comin’?

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I’m glad we met later in life. I don’t think my mother would have let me play with you.

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I’m in a Wal-Mart parking lot watching a woman who can’t remember where she parked. Everytime she holds her remote in the air, I honk my horn.

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